I'm Not a Nice Person

I have a couple of friends who insist on analyzing pretty much everything I say and do. They seem to have a hard time just listening. Just being there.  And one of these friends then does pretty much the exact opposite in her own life.

It's not that rare, I know. It's so much easier to tell others why they do or say things and what would be better to do or say.  Tonight? I found myself analyzing someone. Okay, that makes it sound nice. What I was really doing was being a bitch. I'm REALLY good at that.

So here's the scenario. Reading through Facebook posts (Tweeties, hush now!) and I come across a complaint about working a 12 hour day, spending an hour cooking a meal from scratch, and the kids eating it all and being gone from the table before the mom could even sit down.  Of course everyone else commented on what a great mom this person was, pointing out things that might help her feel better:

• You're an awesome mom
• At least your kids ate it, my kids won't eat
• Sounds like you made something they liked
• Try doing this
• Try doing that

Then there's me: What you do is not cook from scratch after a 12 hour work day. 

~Magickal Graphics~

That was actually the nicer version of what I originally wrote, which went along the lines of "You're a sucker. Don't cook after a 12 hour work day - save it for days you don't work or at least work less hours." Along with some other variations.

Her response was that she enjoys cooking for her kids and only gets to do it every other week.

This is when my extreme bitchiness set in and my THOUGHTS (Edited: 10/26/12: I did not POST these thoughts on FB because I realize they were way out of line) went along the lines of, "You obviously posted this to get people to tell you what a great mom you are and that you're under appreciated. If you're going to bitch about spending an hour cooking after a 12 hour day and your kids eating without you, then don't cook. Maybe cook when you don't have them and freeze it so you can spend that hour doing something with them. Also? You made the decision to end your marriage, so it's your own fault you only have them every other week AND that you now have to work 12 hour days."

Yep, I was THAT bitch. And I shocked myself. Especially since it's not like I haven't posted similar things. Sometimes for exactly what I said above: I wanted/needed someone to tell me I was a good mom. But more often than not I just needed to vent, I needed to know someone else was feeling or had felt this way before, and I fully expected some sarcastic comments.  Also? I made the decision to leave my husband, and everything I'm going through right now? My own fault! So, yah, way worse than my aforementioned friends who at least didn't get that mean about things! (Or did but didn't verbalize it.)

Magickal Graphics

My most bitchy comments usually come from feeling inadequate and jealous. I do recognize this and try to curb it. And the person above? I've been battling my jealousy of her for years. She took my best friend, BGB. (If my best friend is reading this and trying to figure out why I've nicknamed her BGB,she just needs to think about the song she always says describes her.)  I knew in my heart that my best friend needed her - I'd moved 2.5 hours away when BGB needed a best friend the most. She helped bring BGB out of her shell, reminded her how to have fun, had her back at all times.  And all I could do was watch from afar. She's also in great shape, has fantastic boobs and is completely confident in herself. She goes after what she wants, stands up for what she believes in, and doesn't put up with any shit. Frankly, she's kind of a conceited and rude at times, but if she's your friend you'd better believe she's going to be there for you no matter what. AND she fricking cooks from scratch after a 12 hour work day? Wth? I don't cook from scratch on a day off. 

The moral of this story? Don't be my friend on Facebook and make sure your settings are for only Friends (not Friends of Friends). Otherwise? Expect sarcastic comments. Not bitchy, because I usually filter those out, but definitely sarcastic. And if you are my friend? I probably do actually like you - I just get jealous and cranky at times. Don't be afraid to call me on it. 

Bigtime Fail

I lost my own DietBet. I was the only one of the 8 of us to lose. I started with the best of intentions:  

1.   I would be committed.  
2. I would post at least weekly about my progress, along with any tips and recipes I came across.     
3. I’d link up with the Pish Posh challenge.   
4. I’d meet my goal.

And I didn’t do ANY of those things. 

Hoping to entice participants, I offered some prizes and winners would be entered into a drawing. I figured I’d meet my goal and at a minimum get my $40 back to spend towards prizes, plus two of the prizes would be donated.  Bigtime fail. I didn’t win and didn’t get the two donations (more my fault than the donators).  The failed DietBet wound up being slightly expensive. 

•   $40 buy-in        
• $25 JCPenney gift card (sorry @red_writinghood I STILL haven’t mailed this)       
•  $25 Victoria Secret gift card         
• Mary Kay mini fragrance set         
• Mary Kay pedicure set

But, on a more positive note, I took this picture towards the end of the game – as I headed out to my Burlesque 101 class. I think I look okay. Even if the pounds didn’t fall off, the skirt I bought at the beginning of the bet is now too big, so something was happening! So I’m okay with not meeting the goal in pounds.

Want to see more pictures? Check out my Facebook page. 

A special thanks goes to Redhot Writing Hood for participating AND helping get a few additional participants.

Interested in DietBet? Check out their website and join an open bet or host your own. It’s a great motivator and can be fun. I did win my first two bets but at this point think I’ll work on toning and not worry about the scale anymore!

The Liebster Award

My amazing Tweetie, Redhot Writing Hood, nominated me for the Liebster Award. (She also joined my DietBet and wrote a blog post about it - now THAT'S a friend!) This is flattering considering I hardly ever write on my blog. Glad to know someone is enjoying it! And sorry it took me so long to respond to this! I'm not really sure what the Liebster Award is,but I'll take whatever recognition I can get!

Apparently it comes with rules and such, so here goes.

The Rules

1. Each person must post 11 things about themselves.
2. Answer the 11 questions the person giving the award has set for you.
3. Create 11 questions for the people you will be giving the award to.
4. Choose 11 people to award and send them a link to your post.  Go to their page and tell them.
5. No tag backs.

11 Facts About Me

1. I get bored very easily - which is partly why I change my hair every other month.
2. I exercise because I have to not because I actually enjoy it!
3. I really want to do a basket toss. I never got to try it when I was a cheerleader.
4. I was a size 0 my senior year in high school and wish I'd known enough to enjoy it back then!
5. I love to surprise people with little gifts, but I'm mostly too broke to do it very often.
6. My favorite job ever was coordinating after school programs. Wish I hadn't let pregnancy hormones and a not-so-nice boss push me into quitting.
7. My dream is to have an after school program for middle school kids - there's really no place for kids that age to be safe and supervised without being stuck with a bunch of younger kids.
8. I love Old Vine Zin wines. Bogle is one of my favorites and I can actually afford it.
9. I have a huge crush on Scarlett Johansson and on Sass Herass.
10. One day I want to do a burlesque solo on stage.
11. I'm shy and socially awkward in real life.

My 11 Questions to Answer

1. What types of movies do you prefer? Drama and thrillers, I suppose, but I also like comedy and chic-flicks.
2. If you could travel anywhere in the world, where would it be? Jamaica. I'm not really sure why - it's the first thing that popped into my head.
3. If you could relive one moment in your past, what would it be? Hmm, sorry, can't really answer that one right now!
4. Dogs or cats? I'm not much of a pet person. Probably dogs, though.
5. If you had a bitchin' fake tan, would you be a member of Jersey Shore? Um, no thanks!
6. Do you believe in ghosts? Yes. When I was a kid we moved into a house and lots of weird things happened, like pens flying out of the bathroom at me when nobody was in there!
7. What is your favorite time of year? I really love fall. The only problem with it is that it reminds me that winter will be here soon, and I hate winter. I grew up in Arizona - I don't like the cold at all!
8. What color do you have the most of in your closet? Black and white. I'm starting to diversify, but I do have a lot of black and white and denim.
9. Are you a white underwear girl or do you like them colorful? Colorful for sure. I think I own maybe 2 pair of solid white underwear. 
10. What are you the most passionate about? I guess after school programming. It's so important to have safe, affordable places for our kids to be once school lets out. There are so many single parents, or families where both parents work, and after school care is often ludicrously expensive or not available for certain ages at all. 
11. Do you get up early or stay up late? I get up early because I have to for work. It sucks ass. I'd prefer to stay up late and sleep in, but I don't get to do that often.

My 11 Questions for my 11 Liebster Nominees:

1. What do you get out of blogging?
2. What's your favorite thing about being an adult?
3. Do you believe in soulmates?
4. What's one thing that can always make you smile/laugh, no matter how bad of a mood you're in?
5. What's something on your bucket list?
6. What's your go-to recipe?
7. If someone handed you $2,000 to take a weekend trip anywhere you want, with a stipulation that you could not use the internet or your cell phone for those 48 hours, would you accept it and if so, what would you do?
8. When was the last time you colored a picture?
9. What's the sweetest thing someone has done for you in the last year?
10. What was your last random act of kindness?
11. What's your biggest turn off?

11 People I'm Awarding

1. Divorced D20 Dad
2. Not Blessed Mama
3. An Angry Girl Who Does Yoga
4. My Life as Lucille
5. The Glamorous Life of the Modern Day Soccer Mom
6. Fadderly
7. Life in the Northwest
8. Pish Posh
9. 30andfatto40andhalfmarathon
10. Jenbug blogs
11. Batcrap Crazy

Last, but not least, I'm going to add what some people who know/follow me have to say about me. This has nothing to do with the Liebster Award, I just want to share!

11 More Things to Know About Me (according to others)

1. U care about your friends and family and have a wonderful since of humor about life no matter what it throws U.
2. You got married young, and not because you were pregnant. 
3. You had a baby young. 
4. You wanted to be a stay at home mom and drive a station wagon :)
5. To add to that I think your very feisty, spicy, intelligent and have a lot of perseverance!
6. You can shake your booty like no other!! :D
7. Spontaneous.
8. Sensitive.
9. Bitchy. :p
10. Generous.

Let the DietBet Begin

Yep, it's day 1 of my DietBet. I now have 28 days to lose 4% of my weight. I weighed in at a mortifying 136.6 pounds. Considering I was down to 128 a few months ago, I am NOT happy with this turn of events. I knew my fat pants were getting a bit snug, that my adorable pink and white gingham bikini was not looking quite as flattering, but I was still hoping for the best.

I can find lots of things to blame the weight gain on: not sleeping well (we all know sleep is vital to weight loss, right?), new meds that made me hungry ALL THE TIME (nevermind that I stopped taking them about a month ago), the stress of separating and having my youngest child move 2.5 hours away, feeling like a massive failure at work...  But what it boils down to is they're all just big fat excuses for being a lazy bum who ate too much crap and drank too much over the last few months.

The one positive to the weight gain is that some of it went to my boobs. First place I lose it from, but at least not the last place I gain it.

I need to lose almost six pounds for my game, but my goal is to lose the 8 I've gained. It's a pretty ambitious goal, especially considering my laziness. Contrary to what many think about me, I hate working out. And I love food. Especially food that has lots of cheese. Especially pasta and breads. And I really like my red wine. But I also like fitting in my skinny clothes. I like not having a major muffin top. I really like buying size small panties. So here we go!

This is heaven on earth. Chile Colorado Burritos from
The Food Pusher.

This week's goal is to do some form of exercise at least 20 minutes 3 days and 45 to 60 minutes three days. I'm off to a mixed start. I knocked out week 2 of Jillian Michaels' Ripped in 30.  Of course, I also gave in to a nonfat pumpkin spice latte and a bacon/gouda breakfast sandwich this morning after waking at 4:00 am and being on the road from 5:30 to 8:00 am.

Here's a recipe I'll be using to help keep me away from Starbucks and Krispy Kreme. I like to make up a double batch of these (when I'm not too lazy) and freeze them. I pop two in the microwave in the morning.

Mini Frittata Recipe from Family Fun.

What's your goal this week?

Sexy in time for Halloween

How many times have you looked at all the latest Halloween costumes and snottily pointed out that they're too sexy these days, but in the back of your mind you know part of your issue with them is that you can't fit in one? Okay, maybe that's just me.

This is the costume I want this year. Although I'm slightly irritated that the wings don't come with it.
How is it a fairy costume without the wings?!

As some of my readers know, I participated in a DietBet a few months ago and got down to my lowest weight in years! It was awesome. But the stresses of separation combined with new meds and my total lack of motivation the last two months resulted in some weight gain and loss of muscle tone.My "fat pants" are snug. My back fat is bulging. Ugh. That about sums up how I feel about that. So in order to try to get to my goal weight (125 pounds), tone up, and just plain feel better, I'm doing two things. I hope my friends and readers will join me!

1.  DietBet - You bet $40 you can lose 4% of your weight in 28-days. Weigh-in on the first day and the last day of the challenge by submitting two pictures to the game. Lose weight in whatever way works best for you. At the end of the game, everyone who meets their goal is a winner and the pot gets split between them. In addition, the winners will be be entered into a drawing for the following prizes: a $25 Victoria Secret gift card, a bottle of wine, a Mary Kay miniature fragrance set, and a Mary Kay mint blossom pedicure set. Click here and sign up now- my game starts on Monday, September 17. (I've just emailed support to change the date from the 10th to the 17th, so ignore that it says the game starts now!) Remember, as long as you meet your goal you at least get your $40 back. My last game had a $50 buy-in. The winners wound up with $83 each. 
2. The Pish Posh Challenge - The wonderful Pish Posh is also doing a weight loss challenge; hers doesn't cost any money, though. Check out her 8 week challenge here. I'm joining a little late - but what the heck.

If you're really intense, check out the Whole Life Challenge. I was going to try this out after hearing about it from Crossfit Echelon, but I don't have another $40 right now and I'm not sure I'm ready for this kind of commitment. This is an 8-week challenge and the last day to sign up is September 14.
Here's a summary of how it works: "The Whole Life Challenge is an 8-week health and fitness game designed for you to see what kind of impact you can have on your body, fitness, and lifestyle if you commit yourself to a specific structure. There are three categories for the game - Performance Results, Physical Results, and Lifestyle and Accountability. This is not just a “change your body” challenge. It is a “who you are” challenge! Nutrition, workouts, mobilization, supplements, daily accounting, community engagement -- if you play all out you won’t believe the results you can get!"

It's the food part of this I'm not sure I can commit to... I think I'll take baby steps on that part.

And here are pictures from last year's Halloween costume (Mrs. Edward Scissorhands), just for fun.